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"For 'Best Book' from new and uprising author, your Starlight Accolade winner is...." My heart beat rapidly against my chest, I could hear it in my ears.
"Knoxica HYDEEEE!" The host of the awards show shouted my name into the microphone, and so many emotions flooded over me. "With her autobiography: 'In the Mirror.' " I stood up from my seat in the audience, the crowded roaring with excitement. The tears falling down my cheeks. The blood, sweat, and tears I poured into this biography was worth it, for this very moment.
I looked at my husband, the one one in the crowd giving me a standing ovation. His smile was from ear to ear. I could see how proud of me he was in this moment. He pulled me in for a quick hug and kissed me on the cheek.
I could hardly walk to the stage, my legs were shaking so badly, but somehow I managed to get there and accept my award. The crowd quieted down, the roars of applause and cheering was now a silent room, waiting for me to begin my acceptance speech. I decided I would speak from the heart, that I would wing it.
Wow, thank you. This is absolutely amazing. I say into the microphone. I look out into the crowd and find Milo leaning forward in his seat, still beaming his world famous smile at me.
I would first like to dedicate this award to my husband, Milo. A few tears begin to trickle down my cheek again. I quickly brush them away. Without his support for this past year, this book, this award, none of this would have been possible for me without his constant love and light. He sacrificed a lot for me while I wrote 'In the Mirror' and I don't think he truly knows how much his support is the reason for its success.
Dream big, but start small. There's a lot of truth to this quote. It was something my mom always said to me as a little girl, and something I said to my children while they were growing up. My children rolled their eyes, and huffed, the same as I did to my own parents.
But everyone has to start somewhere. I speak into the microphone wholeheartedly. Whether you are an author, a musician, a doctor, a teacher, the more you practice, the more you challenge yourself, the more you will rise above the challenge.
I almost quit writing. I say seriously. I hear a wave of gasps come from the crowd. Yeah, I almost gave up being an author. I was at a low point in my career. Struggling to just START 'In the Mirror.' The one person who was suppose to guide me, and give me constructive feedback, she bullied me.
I didn't care, I would tell the whole world about how Cheryl Burkey used and abused me as an upcoming author. This was my truth, and nothing was going to stop me now.
She belittled me to the point that I questioned if I was in the right career. I won't say her name out of respect- I stop myself. Cheryl never once respected me or the time and effort I put into writing.
You know what, no, fuck that. Cheryl Burkey is the reason why I almost gave up my passion of being an author. Cheryl Burkey is the reason on why I chose to self publish my autobiography. Cheryl Burkey is the reason that Cheryl Burkey is no longer in the business of being a literary agent.
So you know what? This award is for anyone who has their own personal Cheryl Burkey. A person who makes you feel like you aren't good enough or valued. This award is for you, because you are SO valued, and you are worth so. much. more. than these people think of you.
And don't you dare give up. Keep reaching for the stars, because one day, you'll be in a position like I am, and you will defy all odds, and those people who constantly brought you down, will WISH THEY HAD TREATED YOU BETTER.
And then one day, a year, five years, 20 years down the road, you will look back on all of it. You will thank yourself for not giving up on yourself, when there had been so many reasons on why you should.
So to anyone out there, trying to become an an author, keep writing. Keep starting a story, and then immediately scrapping the idea. Keep changing your story ideas, your character's personalities. Keep a notebook of your ideas jotted down under your pillow in your bedroom.
Write your heart out in that coffee shop, even when it is absolutely exhausting, and your fingers hurt, or until you have carpal tunnel.
The crowd laughs at my stupid joke.
But most importantly - be fearlessly you, and never, ever settle for anything less than that.
Thank you. I set the microphone back onto the stand, and begin my walk back to my seat in the audience. At first the crowd is silent, and I thought that maybe they just hated my speech. The crowd then erupted into a huge roar of cheering and whistling.
One by one each individual began standing from their seats, applauding my speech. I had received a standing ovation, and it felt amazing. I finally let the tears I had been holding in for so long, fall. It wasn't a sad cry, it was an extremely happy cry. I finally was doing what I loved the very most, and it felt amazing.
I quickly took my seat next to Milo, and he greeted me with a tender kiss on the lips.
"Congratulations my love." Milo whispers in my ear. "I couldn't be anymore proud of you." He smiles at me, and squeezes my hand gently.
"I couldn't have done it without you.." I say quietly, smiling at Milo.
And I sincerely meant that. It may have been a long road to get to where I was today, but Milo was the motivation that kept me going.
And that was the most selfless act of love, if I ever did see one.
The End.